The Reality Method 2.0

Joe Rogan: The Alpha Comic

One of the biggest pieces of advice I can give to any guy starting out trying to improve his life, especially with women, is to find a guy who can mentor him in that area — or whatever area he wants guidance in, be it women, business, health, or what have you.

I think all men need role models and mentors. For previous generations of men, those roles have been filled by their fathers, but for at least two generations — maybe three — American men have done without fathers, for the most part.

Without getting too political or polemic, I’ll just say that in response to this lack of mentor figures, men have been characteristically creative in finding role models and mentors when they aren’t provided for us by strong, dominant father figures.

I think one a good public example of a dominance, strong masculine figure is Joe Rogan.

Joe is a comic, which leads me to another piece of advice — if you really want to get great with women, try some stand-up comedy. Few things will force you to refine your sense of humor, frame control, dominance and wit like stand up comedy will.

Remember why Marilyn Monroe said:

If you can get a woman to laugh, you can get her to do anything.

I pick Joe as a good example of a masculine guy not only because he’s a pseudo-celebrity (co-hosted Fear Factor and the Man Show) but because he’s very outspoken, and consequently there are a number of clips on YouTube showing him in various social situations that I think are very instructive.

Without further ado, our first clip of Joe: dealing with a female heckler.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RddzHh9bfyY]

Dealing with hecklers is a fundamental part of being a comedian. Notice how he essentially integrates her into his existing routine without a beat. It’s not so much stand-up as improv, and the most important thing to notice is how the humor of the entire thing turns on the status transactions taking place.

Most of comedy, as well as a lot of improv, has to do with status transactions.

Some may say Joe was too rough with this girl, and destroyed her too thoroughly, but I think that’s just picking nits — it’s a stylistic choice.

Now watch a similar scenario, only this time Joe confronts an obnoxious cock block at a party, a woman who is trying to establish dominance over him.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3lXUd7VxuSA]

Notice how the woman totally interrupts a natural social interaction (a sarge, really) and scares the “hotter” girl away (at 0:04). Joe is still being cool and social, even though she violated social rules by rudely interrupting an existing conversation.

Her entire initial spiel (0:04 to 1:24) is an attempt to build her own value in Joe’s eyes. She is qualifying herself to him, but trying to do it in such a way that she seems cool and aloof. She’s essentially trying to neg him — which tells us that she sees him as higher value than her (and rightly so).

But her routine isn’t gaining any traction. Joe is throwing her small subtle digs. He’s not impressed and he’s not being drawn into her frame. So she goes on the attack (at 1:24 to 1:30) and ups the ante very quickly, trying to establish dominance.

She’s done a poor job reading his character, though (pick-up artists would call it a miscalibration), because Joe blows up at her.

This, my friends, is a pure example of masculine anger being expressed in an appropriate and justified way. He pops off right at 1:30; notice that, in the face of sustained male anger, in just about 20 seconds, this chick is completely backpedaling and trying to gain rapport with him by asking him desperately, over and over again, what his previous point was. She’s trying to rewind the social clock back to the period when he was being polite and calmly debating her.

But she is the one who upped the ante and provoked him; and if science has proven one thing, it is that men are easier to arouse to anger, and stay angry and aroused longer than women do. And this holds true for Joe.

This woman, Lydia whoever, actually got a chance to disengage (at 2:06). But she keeps trying to re-engage him. If she were smarter with men, she would know that once a guy’s anger is aroused, there’s no going backwards (just like there’s no going backwards in a sarge). In fact, she is unable to break out of her own limited frame and continues to try to subtly one-up Joe, making snide comments here and there and finally touching him at 3:18.

I talked about touching guys to one-up them in this post. This kind of patronizing touch she tries to pull is very insulting, and Joe doesn’t stand for it for one minute. Now, bear in mind when you are watching him throw her hand away, that this is America — that is a dangerous act. Some women in this country would try to press charges. Not many, I’ll admit, but enough.

Luckily, Lydia whoever isn’t that dumb. I think she can sense, at least subconsciously, that she’s finally dealing with an honest-to-God Dominant Male.

And who is this douchebag that has his arm around her protectively midway through the incident? And why isn’t Joe afraid of this guy that’s obviously her date and probably her husband?

Because Joe is aware of social dynamics and knows that this guy, who won’t even stand up to his own wife, certainly won’t stand up to a veteran of mixed martial arts who is also wickedly funny and socially keen.

These suspicions are confirmed at 4:42. It’s her beta-male provider, who is not only not standing up to Joe, but also sort of thanking him:

I love her dearly but you’re the first guy who’s stood up to her in that respect.

It is easy to see Joe’s Alpha to this guy’s beta with Joe’s instant comeback, “You’re the guy that likes getting slapped?”

The couple backpedals and tries to regain some of the frame, but without much success.

Lesson: there is danger in pissing off Joe Rogan (and any dominant male).

And now for something completely different.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoQjzJWUvgk]

Here, Joe Rogan goes up against Carlos Mencia, who stands accused of stealing jokes from other comics.

Now, this video is cursed with some horrible carnival music, but you can skip ahead to the action bit itself, which starts at 0:36. Notice how, at the very beginning, the crowd is entirely against Joe and on Carlos’ side.

Now, the video is damn near 10 minutes long, but you don’t even have to watch the entire thing to get the effect. You can, and I think it’s worth it (apart from the ear-killing music) but if you’d rather just get the gory bits, simply click over to the 8:00 minute mark, and see how the on-stage battle ended up: with the crowd totally in favor of Joe, and booing Mencia.

Now that’s frame control.

Notice also how resilient Joe is; he doesn’t back down even though he starts out on stage, without a microphone, trying to yell over both Mencia’s augmented voice and the crowd’s reactions. Talk about unshakeable confidence; vocal projection definitely required.

More people know Joe from UFC and Fear Factor than his standup, so I’ll close with the following clip which, although it’s mostly about UFC, still happens to be extremely pertinent to the concept of the Alpha Male and masculine dominance.

If you want to get right to the meat, click forward to 3:45 and watch through about 6:00.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_BlX8PmTe0]