If she really wants to know your opinion, it wasn’t a shit test in the first place. She is asking because she really trusts your opinion and wants it. That’s a compliment to you.

Her: Does this make my butt look big?
You: I can’t tell from here, would you mind if I climb on top of it to get a better look?
Her: Very funny, really though, do you think it does?

“Good. I’m not tired.”

I’m not sure. I’ll have to ask my chauffeur.

Does my ass look fat?

Don’t worry about it. I like girls with a bit of meat on their bones.

What do you do for a living?

You mean, before I retired? (especially if you’re young) I made some very good trades on the derivatives market.

What kind of degree do you have?

Qualified by Experience. I’ve thought of teaching from time to time, but most of what I know can only be gained by practice.

You’re a player, aren’t you?

No, I’m usually quite serious. Being a “player” is juvenile.

That’s a funny line, did you learn that on the Internet?

Oh, people are quoting me on the net now? Cool.

What were you doing last night?

I met with the president of , to talk about endowing an engineering professorship. What did you accomplish yesterday?

You’re funny (confident, sexy, any “compliment” given too freely)

Yeah, goes with the territory. You should have seen me before I made my first ten million.

I’m not going to sleep with you

Oh, I’ll let you get *some* rest.

I’m going to sleep with you

Only if you convince me that I want you.

You think you’re hot shit, don’t you?

I’ve never thought of myself as “shit” of any kind. I can’t really fathom why so many people have that kind of self-esteem problem.

Ok, I’d like to give you a straight yes, but I’ll give u a gay no.

or

U mean right now? Depends on the mood really…

or

No, my dad is still workin on it..